While no one grieves in exactly the same way, the workplace can either be a source of stability and compassion or a space that feels isolating and overwhelming. Here’s how to support a grieving employee with empathy, sensitivity, and structure.
Understanding grief in the workplace
Grief is a deeply personal and non-linear process. Though most people associate grief with the death of a loved one, it can also follow other forms of loss, such as miscarriage, divorce, or receiving a life-altering medical diagnosis. For this article, our focus is on supporting employees after the death of someone close to them, while still recognising that other losses can have just as profound an impact.
People grieve differently. Some may return to work quickly, craving the routine and distraction. Others may need more time, space, and emotional support before they can fully re-engage. There is no “right” way to grieve and no set timeline.
Grief can affect concentration, productivity, mood, and physical health. A grieving employee may be physically present but mentally distant. Others might keep themselves busy as a coping strategy while silently battling emotional exhaustion.
Creating a culture of acknowledgement
One of the most powerful things you can do is simply acknowledge the loss. When a person returns to work after bereavement leave, avoid glossing over their absence. A quiet, sincere “I’m so sorry for your loss. We’ve been thinking of you. Please let us know how we can support you,” goes a long way.
Avoid clichés or trying to “fix” their pain with advice. Listening, validating, and allowing space for the employee to feel what they feel is more impactful than any perfect words.
It’s also helpful to check in about what they’re comfortable sharing. Some employees may want colleagues to know what happened; others may wish to keep the details private. If appropriate, send a card or message signed by the team, arrange a small gesture like flowers, or organise for colleagues to attend the memorial service if the employee is open to it.
Supporting grieving employees day-to-day
Returning to work doesn’t mean the grieving has ended. It’s often just beginning. As a manager or colleague, you can provide meaningful support in small but impactful ways:
- Adjust expectations where possible. Offer flexibility with deadlines, consider temporary changes to workload, and check whether remote work or flexible hours might be helpful during the initial transition.
- Provide space and privacy. A quiet room, the option to step away when overwhelmed, or simply the understanding that some days will be harder than others can make a difference.
- Normalise grief as part of life. Encourage a culture where people don’t feel pressured to “bounce back” quickly or hide their emotions. Grief may resurface months later, on birthdays, anniversaries, or ordinary days that carry emotional weight.
- Follow up, gently and regularly. It’s easy to offer support in the immediate aftermath, but long-term empathy is equally important. Continue checking in weeks and months later, even with a simple “How are you doing today?”
Leading by example
If you are in a leadership position, your response sets the tone for the entire workplace. Showing calmness, care, and even vulnerability helps others feel safe and supported.
This doesn’t mean overstepping boundaries or making assumptions; it means being available, being real, and knowing when to signpost additional support. A grieving employee might appreciate hearing, “You’re doing so well under difficult circumstances. If you ever want to talk or need help adjusting your workload, I’m here.”
Remember, grief can also affect managers themselves. If a leader is grieving, they may feel pressure to carry on as if nothing is wrong. As colleagues, it’s important to keep an eye on those in leadership who may be quietly struggling under the weight of both personal grief and professional responsibility.
Encouraging healthy coping and boundaries
While employers are not therapists, they play a key role in encouraging healthy coping. Where possible:
- Share resources such as contact details for grief counsellors or trusted mental health providers.
- Depending on how recent the loss is, you can suggest a funeral group that will handle the funeral arrangements with respect, care and dignity.
- Encourage employees to take care of their own wellbeing.
- Be patient and understand that grief can re-emerge unexpectedly.
It’s also important to recognise your own limits. Supporting a grieving employee can be emotionally taxing. Maintain professional boundaries while still offering compassion, and don’t hesitate to seek support yourself if you need guidance.
Honouring the human experience at work
Workplaces, although a professional setting, offer communities of people, each with their own stories, challenges, and losses. Creating a culture where grief is acknowledged and supported helps employees feel seen and valued not only for what they do, but for who they are. Consider establishing an annual remembrance day in which each employee is encouraged to bring something that reminds them of someone special who has passed on. Allow employees to share a memory of their loved one in a safe and enabling environment.
Returning to work can be stabilising in a person’s healing journey, especially when their workplace is one that allows space for both professionalism and humanity.
At Sonja Smith Elite Funeral Group, we understand that the grieving process can be a difficult and deeply personal experience. We can assist with planning respectful memorial services and offer resources to help your team cope with loss in a thoughtful and meaningful way.
If you found this article helpful, you may find The Administrative Side of Passing Away and What to Do When a Loved One Passes On insightful as well.
